Principle #5. The best way to impress a woman

Men: The best way to impress a woman is to be yourself. Don’t brag. Let her get to know all the wonderful things about you gradually, as they come up in conversation. You’ll get farther by asking her questions about herself than you will by telling her about you. If she doesn’t like YOU, the things you own and the things you’ve done are ultimately not going to make a difference.

Of course, we're speaking here about a relationship with a woman of quality. There are always people who are playing a different game entirely – women who are willing to trade their beauty and charm for the benefits that come from associating with a wealthy man, and vice versa.

That being said, as male animals, we're genetically programmed to put on a display to attract our mates. The male peacock's tail has one purpose and one purpose only – to attract a female peacock. Other than that, it's actually a burden to the survival of the male – heavy and unwieldy (not to mention all the time spent grooming it before a date!). Still it survives.

Even those of us past likely reproductive age are still governed by the same forces that guided us in our choice of mates when we were looking to reproduce. Men look for women who appear fertile, and women look for men who can support a brood and are likely to be around through the child rearing process.

(One of the reasons men and women have so much trouble creating and maintaining modern relationships, of course, is that, evolutionarily speaking, men's best strategy is to spread their seed as widely as possible, while a woman's best strategy is to find one man who can help care for her and her child/ren.)

I still say the old advertising aphorism, "don't tell me, show me," yields the best results. Go ahead – wear the Rolex; drive the BMW – just don't talk about them. Just as you can demonstrate yourself to be a person with class by your actions, but if you call yourself "classy," (in a personal ad, for instance, where that phrase is often found), you are by definition, not.

If you're a wonderful person, the woman in whom you're interested will figure it out, just by being around you. And, she's more likely to arrive at that conclusion if, when you're with her, you take a larger interest in her than you do in yourself.

Now, to find someone in whom you might take such an interest! If you, like many of us, find yourself between relationships, you can meet single women and men at one of our innovative Bay Area singles events this week. We never leave conversation to chance!(tm) Click to see our schedule: The Meeting Game Salon.

Men: How do you go about letting a women get to know all the wonderful things about you? Women: What are the things that impress you about a man upon a first or second meeting?

Click "Comments," below to see what others have said, and/or to add your comments.